I went to an awards ceremony last night that I’ll remember for a few reasons. First, it was held in a packed school gym without air conditioning so it was hot as blazes and many of us were sitting in a puddle of sweat. Second, I got to see my daughter recognized for her play on the school soccer team, which was especially sweet because this year she had the guts to try out after not making the team last year.  Even better she not only made the team but was a starter.

Unfortunately the main reason I’ll remember this particular ceremony was the presentation of one of the school’s highest athletic honors. Asked to say a few words about the recipient a teacher/coach said the following (I’m paraphrasing): "I thought about how to describe this girl and what I think is that she and I are a lot alike; we’re both great athletes and students and we’re both really well liked. We had a love-hate relationship this year, and I yelled at her a lot but I think she’s better for it and I think we’ll see that as she succeeds at the high school and college level."

To be honest I couldn’t believe she’d said what she had so after we got home I asked my daughter if she’d heard the same thing. She said "yes" so it seems I did hear right.

Note to teachers, coaches and anyone else in a position to speak about their charges: it’s about the kids, not you. And even if you do believe you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread you aren’t focusing on them if you say "I like you ’cause you’re just like me!"

Last week the Winston-Salem/Forsyth County Schools named its teacher of the year and it was West Forsyth High School’s Amy Maxey. Ms. Maxey happens to be my oldest son Michael’s geometry teacher this year and I can honestly say I think having her as his teacher is the best thing that could have happened to him.  The reason is that it’s an honors level class and when Michael struggled with the class I contacted Ms. Maxey to ask if she thought we should move him to the standard geometry class.  Her answer was an emphatic "no" and that she thought Michael simply needed to work a little harder.  That was good enough for me and Celeste so we kept him in her class.

Here’s the thing, at the beginning of the year lots of kids dropped from her class because they found the work too difficult which is what you might expect from an honors level course, especially geometry. I talked to the father of one of those kids and he encouraged his daughter to drop the class so she wouldn’t screw up her record and hurt her chances at getting into a good college, a legitimate concern.  So between the tough course and the grade consideration, there’s often a lot of motivation to move a kid rather than work with them.  Ms. Maxey could have easily told us to move Michael, and it probably would have made her life easier to do so. One less kid to help through the wilds of geometry, a subject that’s eaten many the high schooler alive, myself included, means more time to spend with the students who "get it." Instead she encouraged him to stay and pushed him to attend her before-school tutoring and review sessions that she runs on a regular basis.

So Michael decided to stay put.  Did he one day wake up a whiz at geometry?  Heck no.  He hates the subject and can’t wait to be done with it.  On the other hand he truly likes Ms. Maxey and appreciates how much she’s tried to help him.  Somewhere down the line he’ll also appreciate the side benefit of this struggle; that he learned how to push himself when something didn’t come easily.  Even this late in the year he’s learning how he needs to change his habits to improve, how much harder he’ll need to work, how many more hours he’ll need to study if he’s going to be a great student.  And on top of that I figure he’s probably learned more about geometry by staying put than he would have if he’d moved, which is the whole point. Would his "letter grade" have been higher in the other class?  Probably, but he’s better off working his butt off for a C than he is coasting to a B or an A and you’ll never convince me otherwise.  (BTW, if we thought Michael wasn’t capable of a B or A in honors geometry we would have moved him, but let’s just say we think the kid has yet to reach his potential).

How’s this for a testament to a teacher: one of her students can’t wait for the day he’ll never have to touch her subject again, but already senses that she’s one of the most influential teachers he’ll ever have, and his parents already know she’ll be one of the most influential teachers in his life.  That’s what I call an educator.