I had lunch on Tuesday with a friend who shall remain anonymous to protect his identity.  He urged me to blog more about big issues like the war, our country’s moronic leadership and all the illegal immigrants flooding our border from Canada.  Said I have an informed opinion and, besides, it’d do great things for my traffic.  Of course all my friends and family have told me it bores them silly when I write about such things and I think it’s because they know I don’t know squat about spit.  But since ignorance has never stopped me before I guess I’ll give it a whirl.  Here goes.

Can we please, please, please just skip forward to November 4, 2008 and then just go right to inauguration day 2009?  At this point we’ve whittled our prospects for a new president down to four people who can’t possibly be any worse than what we’ve got and the differences between the four are essentially the same as the difference between a Honda Accord and a Toyota Camry.  Slightly different body, pretty close to the same price and about as exciting as oatmeal.

Personally I’d least like to see Huckabee ascend to the throne that King George II is abdicating if only because I’m sick and tired of hearing Onward Christian Soldiers.  Yes, yes, yes we’re fighting a war but for God’s sake it’s not the Crusades no matter what the Bible-thumping nimrods like Cal Thomas think.  Honestly I almost don’t care what else Huckabee thinks, I just don’t want to spend even one more day with a President who thinks he’s there due to divine intervention. Think I’m exaggerating? Here’s what his website says: "My faith is my life – it defines me. My faith doesn’t influence my
decisions, it drives them."  I think we’ve had about enough of that.

I’d have to put Clinton as my next-to-last pick.  Why?   I think she’s just as obstinate as King George II and maybe even less likely to say the words, "Sorry I was mistaken."  We’ve had plenty of stiff-lipped resoluteness over the last seven years and look where it’s gotten us. 

That leaves me with Obama and McCain.  Eh.

We have all kinds of big issues facing us (crappy economy, crappy health care system, crappy foreign policy, etc.) but I find myself thinking that really all I want is for our next president to restore our good name and start to rebuild our honor.  I find it disturbingly ironic that when King George II was elected it was seen as a way to lift the Presidency out of the moral gutter that Clinton had dragged us in.  Maybe without 9/11 we’d have simply had four or eight years of a president who really didn’t do much of consequence but ran really well organized meetings.  Maybe God would have merely been invoked in King George II’s great campaign to further redistribute our booty to his silver spoon cohorts rather than in his campaign to smite the infidels sitting on top of his oil fields thumbing their noses at his daddy.  We’ll never know since fate conspired to punish us for our hanging chads.  Did you ever think we’d get to the point where someone could look at Clinton’s, uh, indiscretions and say things like "At least all he did was diddle the intern, it’s not like he blew up the Middle East or anything?"

Since there’s no use crying over spilled milk I guess the best we can do is hope that we get through this year without the King doing too much more harm before our next "president" can come in to start reminding the world that we aren’t all a bunch of torturing, incompetent bureaucrats who leave their own people to die and fester in swamped cities while we do a fly-by.   We need someone to remind the world of all the good that we’ve done and that we continue to do.

So can we just fast forward 10 months and be done with it?  Whether it’s Senator McCain, former Arkansas Governor Huckabee, Senator Obama or Senator Clinton…oh man we’re screwed.