Monthly Archives: December 2006

Kids, Don’t be “The Answer”

Leave a reply

I’ve lately been wondering why I’ve always loved sports, not just playing them but also watching them. I’m not terribly enamored of professional or college sports industries, but I truly love watching the action.  Still I wonder why I, as a grown man, continue to enjoy watching boys and girls, young men and young women, play a game.  I used to assume it was because sports were one of the few places in the world where the winner was always apparent (college football being the notable exception) and where the "better man" on any given day prevailed.  I thought it was the last place in our complicated society where the simplicity of winning, the triumph of hard work combined with amazing talent, was displayed.  How naive.

Now I’m coming to believe that sports are a never ending parable.  My favorite recurring theme is that of the promising young talent who never comes to realize his potential, and of course his polar opposite in the grinder who has a base level of talent but works his ass off to realize his full potential. In the NBA the former gets the shoe contract at 22 and is out of the league at 28, and the latter plays for 10 years, never gets the shoe contract and is beloved by his teammates.  But as with many parables this is an oversimplification.

Take the example of Allen "The Answer" Iverson.  He’s a remarkable talent, a scoring machine and a fearless competitor on the court.  He’s also a malcontent, an inefficient shooter and a ball hog.  I’d argue that the only reason he scores 30+ points a game is that he takes an unbelievable number of shots, and that if he truly wanted to reach his full potential he’d learn how to be a point guard who leads the league in assists while averaging 20 points a game.  He’s just too quick and too good a ball handler not to be a great point guard, but instead he puts on a one-on-one clinic every night, hoists 25 shots a game and leads the league in points scored and teammates-as-spectators.

Now Iverson is playing for the Denver Nuggets after wearing out his welcome in Philadelphia.  Denver already has a great scorer in Carmelo Anthony and the sports prognosticators are all wondering if the two of them can share the ball.  Hopefully they can, but the only way it will happen is if Iverson finally reaches his full potential as a basketball player.  He needs to transform himself into a true point guard.  He’s still one of the quickest guys in the league and if he decided to he could put an incredible amount of pressure on any team in the league by breaking down their defense with his dribble and then distributing the ball to his open teammates. 

Thinking about Iverson reminds me of conversations I used to have with my Mom when I was in high school.  School came pretty easily to me and I could bring home an A-B report card without breaking too much of a sweat.  I was a perennial "B Honor Roll" kid and what I got from Mom was, "Should have been an A Honor Roll, and it would have been if you’d studied harder."  That was usually followed by, "Being smart isn’t enough, you also have to work hard."  The rest of my life has been spent figuring out how right she was. You see I might have been considered pretty smart in high school, but in college I was average at best and my lack of a work ethic took its toll the first couple of years.  It was only when I learned to crack the books throughout the semester, not just before mid-terms and finals, that my GPA started going north of 3.0.

Now as a father I have the opportunity to see the "talent/work ethic" mix at play.  All three of my kids are very bright, all have an immense amount of talent, and all have a varying degree of work ethic.  One seems to have been born with a burning desire to achieve at the highest level and has the straight A report cards to prove it.  The other two seem to have been born with immense imaginations that have them living in an alternative universe about 50% of the time.  The only reason they don’t come home with straight C report cards (or worse) is a fear of the parental wrath that would ensue.  Our straight A kid has no more "natural talent" than our other two, unless you consider an innate work ethic as a talent (it might very well be), but because she works harder she accomplishes more than her siblings at this point.

Now some might argue that measuring my kids’ accomplishments by their grades isn’t fair.  After all there’s more to life than grades.  That’s true and again I think Iverson’s story provides a powerful lesson.  If school is the "game" and grades are a form of keeping score then they matter for that very reason.  But as is the case with Iverson,  how you play is as important as how much you score.

Iverson is famous for a press conference he had during a tiff he was having with his coach about practice.  He hated practicing and repeatedly pointed out that he couldn’t believe he was being held accountable for missing practice.  He figured that if he showed up with his "warrior" mentality for each and every game then practice was irrelevant.  This is a pretty common argument among the talented (I’m so good I don’t need to practice), but in basketball practice is the homework.  It’s where you hone and perfect your teamwork and it’s where you prepare for the big "test".  Talent can get you only so far, and without practice you’re going to encounter a situation for which you aren’t prepared and which no amount of talent will overcome.  His coach understood this and rightly insisted that Iverson practice with the rest of his team, and show up on time for that matter. Eventually Iverson’s intransigence became too much for the team and they put him on the shelf until they could find someone willing to take him.

For my kids the lesson here is that while good grades are important, it’s just as important how they go about getting them.  The reason that my daughter is realizing more of her potential than her brothers at this point is because she’s smart and she "practices".  When my sons "practice" they invariably succeed as well as their sister, but they have to be reminded to "practice" much more often than their sister.  If and when they learn that they need to "practice" without being hounded by their parents then they’ll be in great shape.  Until then I’ll ride them like a rented mule, or to keep on message I’ll be their version of Larry Brown.

Ho Frickin’ Ho

Leave a reply

Call me a Scrooge if you will but I’ve never been much of a "Yippee it’s Christmas!" guy.  Not sure why that is, but it has always been the case.  Luckily for the last 15 years I’ve been balanced out by my wife who usually gets into the spirit about 2-3 weeks before Christmas.  That means our tree is usually begrudgingly wrestled into place by yours truly 5-8 working days before Christmas.  If I’m feeling generous I’ll also do the lights and then the kids and Celeste will take care of decking it out as they listen to cheesy Christmas songs while I find something useful to do around the house, like watching a football game.

This year’s been different because Celeste hasn’t been infected with the spirit of the season either.  I’m not sure if it’s stress from work, the unseasonably warm weather, or the lack of peace on Earth but for whatever reason it’s been a very businesslike holiday season in our house, which means there hasn’t been a push to get the tree up this year.  Thankfully our kids are now old enough to take matters into their own hands and the result is that my oldest, Michael, wrestled the tree into place as I was working in my office last night.  By the time I wound things up at seven I came down the stairs to find the tree up and fully decorated.

Do I feel guilty?  Heck no! I’m elated that I didn’t have to do my normal back breaking, cursing routine as I tried for the 85th time to get the tree to stand up straight.  How festive is that anyway?  Now that I know that I’m not needed for the tree torture I think I might actually start looking forward to Christmas a little sooner.

Or not.  As Esbee pointed out people start getting surly around this time of year and I still have shopping to do.  Bah, humbug. 

Jeff James

1 Reply

One of my closest friends throughout my life has been my cousin Jeff James.  I’m only three months older than he is which means we’ve been hanging out for close to 40 years.  Even though we’ve lived hundreds of miles apart most of that time we’ve been to the beach together many times (one trip when we were about 20 was particularly memorable for reasons I won’t go into to protect both of our careers), and hung out at his house or mine whenever we could.  When I moved to Winston-Salem a couple of years ago I was looking forward to seeing much more of my extended family, and in particular my two cousins closest in age to me, Jeff and Wendy.  Unfortunately I haven’t seen as much of Jeff as I’d have liked but there’s a very good reason for that, and it requires a little background.

When we first got out of high school in the mid-80s all of us went to college.  After a couple of years Jeff decided that school wasn’t for him so he dropped out and went to work.  He was married pretty soon after leaving school and he and his lovely wife Debbie had their daughter Courtney not long afterwards.  So while I was doing the fraternity party thing Jeff was working and starting a family.

A few years ago Jeff decided that he was ready to try school again.  He enrolled at High Point University and effectively lost the concept of free time.  He’s been in school year-round since then, taking a couple of classes each term, all while working full time at BB&T, fulfilling his role as husband and father (Courtney’s a senior in high school this year) and playing in a band. 

Last week Jeff finished his final class and he will be graduating with honors.  If my memory serves me correctly, which isn’t guaranteed due in large part to my brain-frying fraternity activities 20 years ago, Jeff had only one grade below an "A" so his GPA is probably higher than I can count.  To say it is an impressive accomplishment would be doing Jeff an extreme disservice.

Getting through college when you’re 21, have no real responsibilities outside of school and have the energy that comes with being young and not yet beaten into submission by your children, is what I would consider a moderately impressive accomplishment.  Doing it when you’re working full time, haven’t cracked a book in over 15 years and have all the responsibilities that come with being married with children is an accomplishment that few of us can claim.  To do it and graduate with honors is simply one of the great achievements I’ve ever witnessed.

We had a little celebration for Jeff after our family Christmas gathering last Saturday and Debbie threw a surprise party for him on Sunday so that he could celebrate with some of his co-workers and friends.  It was great to see his efforts and accomplishments celebrated, and I hope he realized how proud everyone was of him and how pleased everyone was for him. 

Jeff has always been a great guy, kind and level headed, loyal to his family and friends, always there when needed.  He made some tremendous sacrifices to get his degree (so did Debbie and Courtney by the way) and my hope is that he will realize great rewards for that sacrifice.  He’s certainly earned them.

Nothing I write can do Jeff justice, so just let me end this by saying that I can’t remember ever feeling greater pride in a friend and I’m grateful that I’ve had 40 years to be graced by his presence in my life.  Now that he’s done with school I hope we’ll all be graced by his presence a whole lot more. 

In other words, it’s time to party big guy!

Blackmail Pics Part Deux

Leave a reply

Jonflame
In an effort to beat my cousins to the punch I’m going to show you what I meant by my predisposition to pastels in college.  On top of that I looked like I was about 12 when I was in college.  How the hell did I ever get a date?

Here’s another fairly bad picture of me to be found online:
Jonatconvergebig_1

It was during my "I wonder what I’d look like if I put on 15 pounds in six months and crop my hair" phase and was taken at ConvergeSouth in 05.  I look like some kind of deranged Chia pet. BTW, I’m the one on the left.  I wouldn’t want poor Roch to be cursed with anyone thinking he’s me.

Blackmail Pics

Leave a reply

JodyrussjasonwendychrismariaSee that picture to the left (click on it to bigify it if you want)?  Those are in order from left: my cousin Jody, my brother Russ, my cousin Jason, my cousin Wendy, my cousin Chris and sitting in the front is my cousin Maria.  I’m guessing the picture was taken in the early 80s (ya think?).

Love the hair!

You might wonder if I’m worried about retribution, but with a self portrait like this I’m not sure there’s anything they can do to me.  Oh wait, there are those pictures of me in college when I had a real predisposition to pastel colored shirts.

This could get ugly.

App State is Hot, Hot, Hot for a Couple of Reasons

Leave a reply

Appalachian State, about 90 miles from my house, repeated as Division 1-AA (or whatever they’re calling it these days) football champs last Friday so people around here are fairly well a-buzz about it.  Now I’ve found another reason that the Mountaineers should be proud: Stephen Dubner of Freakonomics fame was an undergrad there.  A commenter on Dubner’s post linked to the App State Hot, Hot, Hot video on Youtube, something for which they might not be so proud.

A couple of my cousins are App grads and in my book they’re even more esteemed than Dubner (what up Wendy and Jody).  I’ll have to ask them how they feel about Hot, Hot, Hot.

Book Me

Leave a reply

I’ve always thought that you could tell a lot about someone by what they read.  Well, if you want to know exactly how strange I really am all you need to do is look at my wish list for books this holiday season (in no particular order):

You Gotta Smell This Stench

1 Reply

One of my favorite bloggers and a guy that I wish I could get together with more for lunch is Jeff Martin, aka Fecund Stench.  His Christmas wish list is a perfect example of why I love his writing.  Here’s the link and here’s the list:

To the following, I wish anything but the Joys of the Season:

  • Telemarketers – I’m sorry that you are poor and this is the best job you could get.  It’s still no excuse.
  • Banks – There may be a good one out there. If so,
    I apologize. But the conditions that bank employees and customers
    endure is inhuman.
  • Politicians – I could put all the good ones in a small closet with Howard Coble.
  • Rabid Liberals – You’re just not helping.
  • Rabid Conservatives – You’re just not helping.
  • Rabid Libertarians – You just want to legalize pot.  We get it.
  • Food Lion – Again, inhuman conditions for employees and patrons.
  • News & Record – One day when you are retired,
    I want someone to explain the editorial gestalt. I don’t get it. See,
    when I make a booboo, I apologize and get on with it. I don’t stand
    there quietly looking at the 800 Pound Gorilla in the room.
  • New Car Dealers – I pray there is a special place in Hell for you.
  • Property Developers – My hands ache to get a hold of you.
  • Jesus Freaks – Why is Jesus such a babe?  Would you not have fallen for an ugly man?  Or God forbid, a woman.  Wake up and smell the coffee.

Circuit City and Verizon

Leave a reply

When I was in Circuit City buying a new router today I walked past the Verizon Wireless kiosk which happens to be next to the cashiers at the front of the store.  I wanted a new case for my PDA so I grabbed it off a display tree and went to the register.  The clerk looked at my two items and said that he could handle the router purchase for me, but only the Verizon folks could sell me the PDA case. 

I looked over at the Verizon folks and saw one of them talking on the phone while he tried to assist a lady with her phone and the other talking on the phone while he processed the phone order he was working on.  Standing in something that could be loosely defined as a line, since there wasn’t really a "line starts here" place by the kiosk, were three people looking pretty pissed off as they waited for service.  Of course I bought my router and put the case back on the display tree.

The whole thing made no sense to me.  Why wouldn’t Verizon work out a deal with Circuit City to allow the Circuit City employees to process the purchase of peripherals?  I understand not letting them process the phones (i.e. contracts) but why not everything else (ear pieces, cases, pre-paid phones, etc.)?  They have to know that there will be times when their employees are busy helping customers get new phones, which is a long sales and paperwork process, and consequently there will be a long wait for someone who wants to make a simple peripheral purchase.  Verizon might get a lower margin on the peripheral sale if Circuit City processes it, but they could build that assumption into their contract negotiation with the store.  20% of something is still better than 100% of nothing.

And why would Circuit City create a situation that is potentially irksome to customers?   Believe me, when the clerk told me I could only buy the case from the Verizon guys my first inclination was to look at the clerk and say "Are you serious", and that’s what I did.  That gave him the opportunity to show me his surly "the holidays suck" side, and that’s what he did.  Consequently I’m ticked off at Circuit City, not Verizon.

The irony is that it’s probably the Verizon employees who really made the situation worse.  I took one look at them chatting on the phone with their girlfriends while working with customers and knew it was a minimum 45 minute wait to get service. I’m not waiting that long for a $20 case.  Unfortunately that is exactly the kind of service I’ve come to expect from Verizon so I wasn’t surprised, while on the other hand I expect Circuit City to be able to take my money for a simple purchase (I long ago gave up on looking to them for expert advice on anything they sell) so when they couldn’t meet my already minimal expectations I was really put out of sorts.

By the way, I was there at mid-day on a weekday.  Yes it’s the holiday season, but it really wasn’t very crowded at all.  Imagine what it will be like at 5:30 today and how much business Verizon could potentially lose and how many customers might show up at the cashier to be told they can’t be helped?

Fried Router and Google Desktop on Today’s Menu

3 Replies

There are lots of pluses to self employment and/or working from home.  Not having to shave for days on end, wearing sweats and a t-shirt on a daily basis, showers-optional, etc.  On the other hand there are some definite negatives like bad-smell-syndrome and anything related to technology.

This morning my router was fried (me thinks it had something to do with the crackling I heard emanating from my power strip) so without the convenience of tech support it was off to the store to buy a new router.  The router that was fried was a Linksys Wireless G router that I purchased when the G standard had just been produced, I think around four years ago, and this morning as I was driving to Circuit City I had a vivid recall of the decidedly non-automated set up procedure for the old router.  In other words I remembered how painful an experience it was for your average non-tech-geek to install a wireless network.

I bought the next version Wireless G router (with speed and signal booster!) and ran back home.  I popped open the box and saw these magic words on a big red sticker: "RUN CD FIRST: Do not unplug any existing PC or Networking Equipment".  For once I followed instructions and two minutes later the router was up and running, the security settings were set up automatically without me having to re-learn all that crazy lingo (WEP, WAP, whatever) and my computer, which is the only one cabled to the router, had a nice internet connection. 

Next I was asked by the install program if I wanted to install other computers on the network.  When I clicked yes it asked if it was wired or wireless.  I clicked wireless and then it asked me if I could temporarily attach it by cable to the router for the install.  I said no and it then asked me if I had a USB flash drive.  I said yes and it prompted me to plug in the drive and then it installed a setup program and said all I needed to do was plug the drive into any other computer I wanted to install on the network and the program would automatically configure the computers for the network (assuming they’re all running Windows XP).  SWEET!

I went downstairs to Celeste’s office and kicked her off her computer so I could get it back on the network.  I plugged the flash drive into her USB port and then waited, and waited, and waited.  What the hell? So I pulled up Task Manager and saw her CPU at 100% usage.  I looked at what was running and noticed a butt-load of memory being chewed by Google Desktop and other Google Pack goodies.  I shut them off and she instantly went to 23% usage.  Hmm.

As soon as I turned off Google the Linksys install program launched and we had her online in about 60 seconds. When it was done loading and I’d confirmed her connection was good, and that she had a much stronger connection than she’d ever had with our old router, I uninstalled all of her Google stuff. 

All told my tech support job cost me about an 1 1/2 today, but the result is we seem to have a much stronger wireless network and I’m coming to believe that Google really wants to be like Microsoft.