Last night we had our monthly Lewisville Zoning Board of Adjustment meeting, and I have to say it provided two highlights for my very short (so far) career in public service. 

First we had our Bible incident.  Since the Board of Adjustment is technically a judicial body we have to swear people in to give testimony.  For the swearing in we needed a Bible, but for some reason we couldn’t find a single one in Town Hall.  Luckily our attorney had a Bible memory card for his Palm, which technically qualifies as a Bible.  So when everyone was sworn in they had to raise their right hand and put whatever they could fit of their left hand on the memory card.  Basically it looked like they were pushing a button with a finder on their left hand, but it worked.

The next moment came during one resident’s testimony in opposition to the cell tower we were ruling on (won’t go into the details here, but they live across the street from the property is being used for the proposed cell tower).  In the course of their testimony they stated that when the City of Winston-Salem had constructed a water treatment facility on the property next to the property where the cell tower is going to be built the city knocked down all the trees.  The result is that these poor folks have lost the wind barrier that the trees used to provide and they now experience wind gusts that tear up their roof and knock furniture off their porch.  Their concern was that the construction of the cell tower would lead to an even bigger wind problem due to more trees being taken down.

This is the part that tickled my funny bone.  One of the board members was trying to ask them if they had any expert testimony as to the damage that has been/could be done to their house due to increased wind from the loss of trees.  I’ll paraphrase here, but this is kind of how it went:

Board member: "Have you had a, um, wind expert come out and look at the property to make sure the damage is due to the loss of trees?"

Long pause.

Resident: "Well, no, I haven’t had a, um, wind expert look at it.  I wouldn’t know where to find a wind expert."

At this point I kind of lost track of everything for a few seconds because I was doing my best not to smile and giggle.  Obviously this is serious business for everyone, and I understood what everyone was trying to say, but the whole "wind expert" thing and the resident’s reaction just cracked me up.

Anyway, we got the testimony we needed from Nextel, the residents were able to say their piece and we were able to make our ruling despite the moments of levity.  As always it was an educational experience for me, and I’m just amazed at the civility everyone displayed.  Considering that the cell phone company has a lot riding on the decision in terms of service to its customers, and that the residents are seeing a direct impact on their homes I have to really commend them for how they handled themselves.  In the case of the residents in particular, I only hope that I can behave as well if I find myself in a similar situation.