Category Archives: Stupid People

Hey You, 4 Hubby…

You know you've pulled a jerk move when two different people post pictures of your parking job online and ask for comments.  Here's a tip: if you're that worried about your paint job then take up two spaces on the far end of the lot (a minimally jerky move) rather than two spaces that are right outside the entrance (a maximally aholey move).

Comment of the Day Reminds Me of the Whole Glass Houses Thing

So Arizona education officials want to reassign teachers with heavy accents so that they aren't teaching students who are learning English.  The story's here and the first comment on the story is this:

Have you spoken with any college aged students lately? The number of functional illiterates in our primary and secondary school system is disheartening. Unless these students can hear English spoken correctly at home and on the street, yet alone taught it correctly in our schools we should all start calling it "bassetball" or say "ax" instead of ask, or perhaps we can all "boat" instead of "vote"??? how much further down do we have to lower our standards to allow for "the acceptable " lever of mediocrity?

"Lever of mediocrity?" "Yet alone?" 

Pot, meet kettle.

Convenience Fee

I just registered my daughter for her club soccer team for next fall.  I opted to pay online and after I hit the "submit" button for the payment a window popped up saying that I was going to be assessed a $1.75 "convenience fee" for paying online with a credit card.  A friend of mine had a much more appropriate term for this kind of fee; he called it a d-ck fee.  And if you're wondering what the dash stands for let's just say that the word would not be a bird that quacks.

That kind of crap makes me want to drive over to the office and pay with a sack of pennies.

Teh Stupid: DWI on a Motorcycle

As dumb as it is to drive drunk, how much dumber is it to drive drunk on a motorcycle?  You'd think that no matter how drunk you were you'd at least have some basic survival instict triggering alarm bells in your head.  You know, something like: "Daggum I'm hammered. Maybe getting on the road and traveling at speeds that God never intended for human beings, and NOT being surrounded by a ton of metal and airbags ain't the best idea."  The good news is that drunks this stupid likely will do the most damage to themselves and the people dumb enough to ride with them, while the "smarter" drunks tend to take out their stupidity on the rest of us.

Merry Christmas from Microsoft! (or How I Plan on Hooking Up the Xbox 360 to Our Network Without Paying Microsoft Another $99)

One of the oldest's Christmas presents this year was one year of Xbox Live for his Xbox 360.  What we didn't realize when we bought the service and a wireless controller to make playing MMPGs super-easy is that the XBox 360 requires a special wireless network adapter to be able to connect to our home network.  The bastards at Microsoft couldn't be bothered to design a connection that would allow a "generic" network adapter to work, and because I've been able to hook up all nature of things to our network, like say our Tivo, with standard network adapters it never occurred to me that we'd have to buy a special one for the Xbox 360.  And what does one of Microsoft's little gizmos cost?  Oh, a cool $99.

Luckily we have two alternatives.  One is to hook the Xbox 360 directly to the router with an ethernet cable, but since our router is in my office on the second floor and the Xbox is hooked to the TV in our den in the basement that would have to be one very long cable.  Our other option is to use a powerline adapter which is the way I plan to go.  I've already set up a powerline kit to connect Celeste's computer to the network so I only need to get one more adapter to hook up the boy's XBox 360 which should save us at least $50, not to mention the little bit of satisfaction I'll be getting from not letting Microsoft screw me yet again.  I figure 20 years of this abuse is enough.

Not the Sharpest Knife in the Drawer, Part Whatever

One contributing factor to newspapers’ current problems might be that some of their management might not be too bright.  A former Raleigh N&O writer blogs about a memo sent out by one of the editors at the paper with his/her evaluation of that day’s issue:

A few comments on some good work in today’s paper:
–A lively front page that gave our readers plenty to talk about.
Has the political right truly turned the corner and will cease to
demonize opponents on so-called moral issues, or are we witnessing the
boldest, most cynical, most hypocritical political spin in modern
history? What is one to make of John McCain’s greeting at the Twin
Cities airport yesterday of America’s most famous baby mama with a warm
hug, and the apparent attaboy pat on the shoulder for the
self-described “f***ing redneck” baby daddy? Are we now celebrating
teenagers’ raging hormones?
The claims department feature (see 8a) is a great reader service. I
would like to see more scrutiny of the “facts” in Sarah Palin’s speech
last night.

Now to our local politicians….Is Kenn Gardner just an inept liar
or a man so greedy that he doesn’t care whether we think he’s an inept
liar as long as he gets paid?

–A newsy and entertaining Triangle&Co. front.
I’d bet that Barry Saunders is hearing a lot of amens this morning as
well as feeling a lot of hate. Good. A columnist should stir ‘em up.
Much of America may have forgotten, but the black community has a very
long memory of Republicans demonizing black unwed moms. The black
wire–radio and a growing black blogesphere–is crackling this morning
with wicked “Juno” jokes. In general, black bloggers ( A warning to the easily offended, the name is a big clue)  are having a great time with the GOP show in Minneapolis.

–Lots of interesting people stories in the sports section about
college athletes and the pros. For those following tennis’ sibling
rivalry, Serena has gained a slight lead by beating older sister Venus
in the U.S. Open quarterfinals.

–Good, timely story–and an inviting headline (Life over breasts)– on the Life, etc. cover.

Given that the cardinal sin that newspapers and other news outlets are accused of committing is "bias" you would think that a manager at a prominent news outlet would avoid putting his/her biases in writing.  Everyone has biases, but when you’re in a business that lives off of its reputation for objectivity, well you just might want to keep those biases to yourself.  If you put it in writing it will find its way to someone you don’t want to see it.  We’ve had email and the web for, oh, 15 years or more and to think that someone in the media wouldn’t realize this would go public is just too dense for words.

Legal Tender Not Accepted

More fun on the education front.  In a school district in New Jersey 29 students have been given two days of detention for paying for their $2 lunches in pennies.  Apparently it started out as a prank, but then turned into a protest over shortened lunch periods.  The school superintendent says that the students were disciplined "for holding up their peers and disrespecting lunch aides."

What I love is that the "educators", who must see every problem as a nail that must be hammered, couldn’t come up with a solution that would counteract the protest.  The evidence that the "educators" were outsmarted by the eighth graders is the fact that the local media picked up the story.

What could the "educators" have done to avoid this little PR fiasco?  Maybe take the pennies, put them in a cup labeled with that students name and then count them after the lunch period is over.  If the student’s payment is short then he or she can be billed for it later.  That way the students’ peers aren’t held up and their protest will peter out fairly quickly once they realize how hard it is to gather 200 pennies on a daily basis and then tote them to school.

Hey I’ll be the first to say that eight graders can be a royal pain in the a– to deal with, and sometimes I think that middle school teachers should get combat pay, but to be so stupid as this I think the "educators" involved here are getting what’s coming to them.

And I Thought Check-Raising Was Bad

I used to play in a lot of basement poker games when I lived in DC.  In fact I played in some basement tournaments that paid out very handsomely to the top two or three finishers, and as far as I know the tournaments were legal because the host kept nothing.  In fact the only game that might have been illegal was one hosted by a guy that asked everyone to ante up a couple of bucks for food and if you charge for anything like that you’re technically running an illegal game.

Luckily for me I never found out if the basement games were legal or not because none of them were ever raided.  Some poor schlubs in California weren’t so lucky as evidenced by this first person account of a raid by the San Mateo Sheriff’s department on what sounds like some pretty low-stakes poker players. 

Back in 05 there was a raid at Ham’s Restaurant over in Greensboro that maybe is a little more understandable since it was held in a public place and the prize was pretty significant ($10,000 seat in a poker tournament). Not saying I think it should have been raided since everyone involved seemed to think they were running a legal game akin to a Bingo Night, but still it’s a little easier to swallow than raiding some suburban low-stakes basement game. Unless someone’s making serious money or scamming the players I just don’t see how busting these friendly games is a good use of law enforcement resources.

Speaking of good basement poker does anyone know a nice friendly poker game in the Winston-Salem area?  I promise I won’t breath a word about it, and as my friends in VA will tell you I’m usually very popular with the other players.  In other words I suck.